Simultaneous Orgasms

Some couples feel pressure to reach orgasm at the same moment. That's nice when it happens, but it's an unrealistic goal for every sexual encounter. Even having the expectation that both partners reach orgasm -period - in every sexual encounter creates undue pressure and may even work against that possibility.

If orgasm is your goal, however, it often works better when you go for one orgasm at a time - usually starting with the woman. As the male partner, you can practice getting the manual or oral timing just right to maximize your partner's pleasure. The more you learn about your partner's response to certain stimulation and the more easily you can help facilitate her orgasm, the more enthusiastic she'll be about returning for more.

If you're the female partner, don't just assume that your partner's orgasm is going to be an automatic and that you don't need to pay attention to his specific needs. Ask him how it works best for him and how the two of you together can give him the most satisfaction. Just because his orgasm may be easier to achieve than yours doesn't give you a free pass to let him work it out on his own.